Quarantine 15

Most people are familiar with the "Freshman Fifteen." A student goes off to college, and faced with unhealthy all-you-can eat cafeteria options and countless late-night pizza (and other) parties, gains 15 pounds their first year. Of course, not all first-year college students gain 15 pounds. I am sure many people will take this time at home to cook healthier foods and focus on their exercise routine. As for us, I am cooking more...but not necessarily healthier ("Hey! Look at this cake on Pinterest! Heck, don't have anything else to do today, might as well bake it!"), and not walking to the bus stop or running errands is definitely cutting into my step count. So, after two months of tracking my diet using Noom (more on that another time, maybe) and being somewhat successful, I fear I am looking into the face of the QUARANTINE FIFTEEN (and yes, I know we do not truly have a quarantine, but that's what everyone is calling it, and it rhymes). Or, as I've also heard it called, of course, the COVID-19.

For me, personally, things feel stressful enough without having to decide between wine or dessert, or fretting about what snack to have. I'm not looking for a pep talk; it is what it is.

In that spirit, here are some of things I cooked last week. I'm running a week behind; it turns out having two kids at home all the time has really cramped my style.

• GF Irish Soda Bread - my mother-in-law's adapted recipe. One with raisins; one without. It came out pretty good!
• Corned Beef and Cabbage - I started making Pioneer Woman's Corned Beef and Cabbage a few years ago, and it would take a lot to convince me to make it any other way.
• Loaded Potato Waffles - I didn't do so much loading, just popped a fried egg on top and served it with Tomato Jam from Food in Jars, which I actually canned two summers ago.
• Poultry Stock - While cleaning out our freezer, I found a chicken and turkey carcass, so I boiled them with some veggies and herbs to make poultry stock. I later made regular and GF chicken noodle soup with it. Calling it just "chicken" soup to keep it simple for the kids. 

I also found a stash of meat in the freezer when I was cleaning it out. I have a thing with buying "Special Today" meat and throwing it straight in the freezer, but it turns out I had quite a backlog. So, for no special reason, we had filet mignon with hasselback potatoes last night. 

So, we're eating well for the time-being. I'm thankful we have everything we need on hand or accessible at the moment. 

The Other Side of the Doorway

I look at the bouquet of flowers on our dining room sideboard that I bought during my last grocery store trip last Friday. Just something to brighten things up during our two-week quarantine. I feel like I bought them in another lifetime. It was the same when, yesterday, I pulled a receipt out of my pocket from eating lunch out with Mister P last week after shopping at Costco. Or when I look at the shirt I bought there a little more than a week ago, when closing school seemed like a vague possibility, but not something that I really expected to happen; at least, not so soon. These things are like relics from "before," and I wonder when everything will be from "now."

I have a vivid memory of, a few days after Miss A was born, standing in our kitchen, overwhelmed and delirious with exhaustion. I had the distinct feeling of having walked through a doorway that I could look, but not pass, back through. I saw an enormously-pregnant, but relatively well-groomed woman using her brain at work, casually shopping, laughing with adults, cooking, and chatting with her husband after dinner. I missed being her so much, I cried. I wanted to go back through the door, but here I was. I could only look.

I feel like we all have passed through another doorway. I'm not sure what this new dimension holds, yet. It seems so unsteady. I didn't know then, either, but I know now that that moment was the lowest, or close to it. I guess my fear is that we are not there, yet, or even close to it.

Well, I Guess This Is Growing Up

I've wanted to write a COVID-19 post since last week, but have had too many unrelated thoughts tumbling through my brain to come up with anything cohesive. I'm not certain this will be be cohesive, either. But, I'm able to tie in a post that I've wanted to write since before I stopped working seven years ago, so, at least, there's that. 

When I worked at Howard Community College, I participated in a program called Step-Up, where volunteer faculty and staff provided life-coaching for students. For about two years, I coached a young woman who was 19 years-old. One day, she told me about a weekend trip she planned to take with her friends - her first trip without any "adults" (in quotes since a 19 year-old is technically an adult, anyway). I remember thinking about what a milestone that type of trip was on the road to becoming a Grown Up (tm). And, it got me thinking about when, really, does one become a Grown Up (tm)? From the very beginning, kids are on a path towards independence, but at some point, they cross a threshold and become a Grown Up (tm).

So, for me, it certainly wasn't turning 18. Going to college? A little, but not really. I was still mostly financially dependent on my parents, their house was my permanent address, and I didn't have to cook my own meals. Moving from Pennsylvania to Maryland, renting my own apartment, and paying my own bills? Maybe that was it. But things have happened since then that made me "grow up" more...getting a full-time job with benefits...settling down with partner ...buying a house...having kids...

I think I thought I was done "growing up."

Dealing with COVID-19 with school-aged children and aging parents is a new, unique "growing up" milestone. The stratagizing and planning. Trying to maintain a sense of calm and normalcy that we've taken for granted. Finding the balance between being honest and earnest (like, really, please, wash your hands and do NOT PUT THINGS IN YOUR MOUTH), and not making the kids feel anxious or scared.

A friend commented how the world feels like it did after 9/11...surreal and full of uncertainty. How were we supposed to feel? What were we supposed to do? I remember that. But now, even though maybe we have a little more control (do we?), almost 20 years, a mortgage and two kids later, I feel like more is at stake and I am worried about more. Twenty years ago, I would've looked at this current situation with more curiosity and less anxiety. Now, I don't like not knowing what will happen. I don't like not being able to plan into the future. I'm worried about kids' education - more other kids than mine. I'm worried about small business owners, low-wage workers, and health care professionals. I'm angry about our Administration's incompetence and wonder how/if things could have been different.

This is a new world for us. I don't know if we're ready for it. I think this will be more than our children's generation's lunar landing or Challenger explosion. Even though the world changed after 9/11, I think this will have an even greater impact. I hope we rise from the ashes on the other side of this.

Gluten-Free Diet, an Introduction

For as long as I've known Kevin, he's had digestive issues. There have been periods of time when the issues have bothered him more than others, and there have been times when it has really interfered with life. Over the years, I've read about a variety of diets and how can they can impact the digestive system, but, honestly, I found it all overwhelming. "These foods will help reduce inflammation. Unless you have a sensitivity to X, then your belly will be on fire. And also, those foods you have a sensitivity to are healthy and delicious." And, of course, other than dairy, we hadn't pinpointed anything that caused a problem. I told him, "Look, if you can figure out what kind of diet will help you, I'll be happy to cook it." I just wasn't up for playing detective for someone else's gut.

About two months ago, after a day of unintentionally eating gluten-free, after dinner, Kevin said, "I've been thinking about trying a gluten-free diet." His mother had been on one for about a year to treat an inflammation disorder with some success. "Oh, ok," I replied. "When do you want to start?"

"How about now?"

Two days earlier, I had purchased literally a dozen boxes of pasta on sale (we eat a lot of pasta), and, obviously, I had given this no thought at all. But, he felt like he was on a roll from his GF day, so I agreed to...roll with it. 

We've tried a variety of GF pasta, which I'll try to review at some point, and GF breads, which are all pretty much terrible. I've also tried some GF recipes for things where a GF alternative is not readily available, or is awful. I'd like to share some of those, too. 

Many times, too, it just means a substitution or just skipping all together. Rice or potatoes instead of noodles. Forgoing bread with dinner, which is probably healthier, anyway.

Apparently, it can take several months to determine whether eliminating gluten has helped your gut, so it's really too soon for us to know if this is making a difference for him. But, at least we are trying something. 

Hello? Is anybody out there?

I've been trying to figure out how to introduce this post.

With a tired old joke?

*tap tap tap* "Is this thing on?"

Or with a GIF?

Or a meme (Is it the text that makes it a meme? Is it still a meme if it also a GIF? I used to be up on this stuff!)?

In any case, since the New Year, I've been thinking about resurrecting this blog. It's been nearly 6 years! The almost-toddler I last wrote about is now a sweet and sassy seven year-old! And, the little boy who was not yet even a twinkle in his daddy's eye will be five in June! I've thought about restarting this several times, but now that both kids are spending more time in school and playing together independently, I might actually have...time? I'm going to give it a shot. I do feel like maybe I missed sharing a lot of good content from the last six years of being a stay-at-home mom, and maybe that is partly inspiring me to publicly document my final months in this stage of life. 

I also question whether people even really read blogs anymore, since so much is documented on other forms of social media. This thought almost made me not bother, but...I read through some old posts, and you know what? I kinda like blogging. The landscape has changed since 2014, but maybe some folks will kinda like reading it, too.